Saturn Stepping into Scorpio - Part 3

Saturn is approaching 4 degrees Scorpio as I write this.  How has it been for you so far?

For me, Saturn is moving away from a conjunction to my IC.  It is now officially transiting my 4th house.

The 4th house is traditionally associated with one of the parents, your home, your roots, your heritage, a sense of belonging to a tribe, endings, the past and your emotional needs.

For the past 2 weeks, a huge amount of fear (of the Scorpionic kind) has been aroused by the health concern of one of my parents.  Thankfully, it is not as sinister as I had first feared.  I thank the Universe for the early warning signals so we have now transformed the way we eat and live (Pluto transiting my 6th).

Ugly emotions - jealousy, suspicion, lust and guilt lurking in the Scorpionic cauldron

I have always been aware of my dark side (with most of my personal planets in the 8th) and with Mars in Pisces, I consider myself to be pretty forgiving.   Lately though, I'm feeling battered by those intense emotions.  

Spending a weekend away at an astrology camp last week has really opened up my emotional channels - not that I wasn't aware of my emotional presence, but rather, it gave me the courage to face them head-on.

Here goes with de-cluttering my emotional junk.

• I've been holding a grudge against someone for almost a decade because of some hurtful words she uttered to me.  In an attempt to console me over a break-up, she said to me, 'He may be the one for you but you may not be the one for him'.  I was speechless.  My heart is breaking here and you give it another stab?!  It may be the truth but it was not what I wanted to hear at that moment.  I've kept my distance from this individual since that episode and have stopped confiding in her.  I'm NOT proud of this at all.  Normally, I can at least forgive but this time, I can neither forgive nor forget.  I don't know if during the 2.5 years of Saturn in Scorpio, or even, in the upcoming Solar Eclipse in Scorpio (as it conjunct my Uranus and oppose my Moon), I will be given the opportunity to sort this out.  If the past wants to catch-up with me, then I'm open to it but don't expect me to go after it voluntarily.

• In recent weeks, I'm particularly feeling pressured to act and behave in ways that are culturally accepted and expected of me.  Conformity is not my strong point, especially with my natal Uranus in my 4th oppose my Moon in the 10th, at least not truly.  I pretend that everything is fine externally when I am fuming inside.  How appropriate that I came across a news article on BBC News today which talks about the exact same topic I'm about to embark on:  Why are people so mean to single people? (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-20219349) I was pretty much minding my own business when I first arrived in Hong Kong four years ago, then gradually, thanks to my tendency to be a sponge, I began to absorb all the judgmental criticisms dished out by the people I meet here - just for being single.  Would you go up to someone and ask, 'Why are you fat?'  or 'Why are you short?' or 'Why are you so ugly?'  Of course you wouldn't.  So why challenge someone for not being in a relationship?  Now, I just reply with, 'I don't know where he is,'  because that is the truest answer I can muster.  I see red when people in dysfunctional relationships begin to attack me on this issue.  But what can one do when we live in a world where people would rather stay with an unfaithful partner and pretend nothing is wrong than be single.  I know for a fact that infidelity is an issue among many of the married couples around me, but they merely turn a blind-eye to it - that is absolutely fine with me, but please don't go around giving me an earfull when you are not perfect.            

OK, rant over.  To those people who have verbally abused me:  Sorry; Please forgive me; Thank you and I love you.....this is something I've picked up at the Astro Camp, even though what I really want to say is:  Piss off; Get out of my sight; Go to Hell and Stay there (couldn't resist that!).

A song for any wounded emotions in your system:

Territorial Dispute

The dispute between China and Japan over Diaoyu/Senkaku Islands is triggering a surprisingly immense amount of discomfort within me (probably because it is a 4th house issue!).  As a British Chinese, I've always been oblivious to what goes on in China.  However, since my relocation back to Hong Kong 4 years ago, my feelings have changed.  My knowledge in Chinese History is almost non-existent.  I just know that China somehow lost Diaoyu Islands to the Japanese a long time ago.  I have never questioned about it. My Chinese friends can openly express their disapprovals towards the Japanese but I can't make myself do that.   Twelve years ago, I took up employment in Japan as an English assistant teacher.  For three years, I have met some wonderful individuals whom I am still in contact with.  I simply cannot stereotype the whole nation.

What is the truth behind this controversy?

The only thing I ask for is the truth, nothing but the truth.  This is rather appropriate with Mercury in retrograde, first in truth-seeking Sagittarius, then in secret-exposing Scorpio.  My 8th house Mercury along with my Pluto in 3rd only ask for the truth to be unearthed.  

Last night, I came across the following article, siding with the Japanese on this issue:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/japan/9636139/Senkaku-Islands-setting-the-record-straight.html

Then I encountered the following article with opposing evidence:
http://kristof.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/09/19/the-inconvenient-truth-behind-the-diaoyusenkaku-islands/

I pray for this conflict to be resolved as peacefully as possible.

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